"Santa's gone home. Santa's fucking dead."

Charlie Brooker on the closure of the Lapland New Forest Christmas theme park
"Santa's gone home. Santa's fucking dead." As theme park slogans go, it's a winner. Sadly, it wasn't the official tagline for Lapland New Forest, the temporary Christmas attraction that was forced to close last week after furious visitors demanded their money back.

Instead, the "Santa" line was shouted at a Sun reporter and a "handful of queuing families" by a member of staff disconsolately closing the gates for the last time.