Bush To Undergo Colonoscopy; Cheney To Assume Presidential Authority

President Bush will undergo a medical procedure tomorrow that will require him to temporarily transfer his presidential authority to Vice President Dick Cheney.

White House press secretary Tony Snow delivered the news that Bush was having a colonoscopy in his noon press briefing. The procedure, which involves a snake-like probe of the large bowel through the rectum, requires sedation and can last up to an hour. Regular colonoscopies to check for signs of colon cancer are recommended for men and women over age 50 every five years.

Sedation?! What a wuss. I had a colonoscopy a few years back and there was no question of sedation.

You do need to have a good clear-out beforehand though, accomplished by strong laxatives and a 24 hour fast, so at least there will be one day in George Bush's life when he isn't completely full of crap.